An Ode to Ky
On this day eleven years ago, we were preparing for your birth. What I didn't know is that we were on the brink of a rebirth ourselves. What we expected was a routine labor and delivery, praying fervently for no complications. However, what was to come was quite unexpected and could not have been predicted by even the highest paid fortune teller.
You are my third child, my third daughter. Out of all my chidren, it is said that you are the most like me, which I find so ironic because you haven't been in the earth as long as your sisters. So how is that so, I often wonder.
Yet, as I sit and reflect, it is clear that your arrival was completely orchestrated by God. He knew what we didn't know, what what we never saw coming. We were so comfortable living what we thought was our best life that we were completely caught off-guard by you.
You were everybody's dream baby: healthy and quick, doing things that showed you were "advanced" for your age every milestone you hit. You never met a stranger; however, you never had trouble communicating to someone exactly how you felt about them, good, bad, or indifferent. You were quite the discerned one.
You never really babbled baby talk; you just took upon yourself to start communicating. It was as you looked at us and said, "Let me school these people. They need help." And thereby thrust us into your world.
Your oldest sister was intrigued by you. Everything you did fascinated her! She would study you as you were the object of her affection was strategically dying to conquer. She was (and still is) so attentive to your every move. Everything you did was a big deal, and proud is an understatement when describing Kourtnei as a big sister. She is always concerned and thoughful when it pertains to you and Khari. I often have to remind her that I am "all of y'all's mama."
The middle sister was not as taken with you in the beginning. She was very busy with her own life when you were born. I have a confession: at times, I even felt a little guilty because so much of our time, money, and attention was on her that I never put you in anything. But you didn't seem care. Whenever you would see her, your little face would light up like a smiley faced emoji. To me, Yukhari's a lot like me: extreme. Either we are a fireball of energy, or we are somewhere lying down by ourselves. Whatever state she was in, you were her audience, cheering for her the loudest when she was performing or watching guard as she slept. "Khari's asleep. Do you want me to wake her up?" I would ask why, even when I already knew the answer. That's just how it is with sisters (smiley face.)
Today, you are simply you. Assured, independent, ready. The beautiful mystery of you is, even when I feel like you're unprepared, you show up "ready," which is still baffling to me. That is a skill I still don't have, and I'm your mom!
Your presence is vital. When you are not somewhere, there is a hole. Whenever you are not somewhere, your name always comes up. You matter. The essence of who you already are is influencing the world world around you. You can be a game changer for God's glory, if you continue to respect the God in and of you. Never forget that.
But more than ALL OF THAT, my prayer is that you love God more than anyone else, that you maintain a relationship with Him. You and I have had talks about what could be, and I feel like you get it. I've explained to you that we all are here on purpose for a purpose with a purpose. I love knowing that you have already began to explore your purpose. I love that you understand it's not about me or your dad. I love that about you, even though, selfishly, I have to admit it's a little scary at times. But I trust God and Him only. So I know the plans He has for you are to prosper you and not to harm you. So when tough times come, and they will, I know that you've already overcome by the blood of the lamb, and the words of your testimony will set captives free.
I love you with a love that is impossible to understand. I love you so much that I never want to smother you. I never want to hold you back. I want you to feel free to explore having knowledge of information as well as consequences. I pray that you approach life as a problem solver and not problematic, always searching for solutions, not just answers. I pray that God's peace always abounds in you, around you, and through you. I pray you be whole and entire, that you lack nothing. I just love you, Dhani Ky, and I like the person you are. Always evolve, but never change. Happy birthday tomorrow, Mama.
You are my third child, my third daughter. Out of all my chidren, it is said that you are the most like me, which I find so ironic because you haven't been in the earth as long as your sisters. So how is that so, I often wonder.
Yet, as I sit and reflect, it is clear that your arrival was completely orchestrated by God. He knew what we didn't know, what what we never saw coming. We were so comfortable living what we thought was our best life that we were completely caught off-guard by you.
You were everybody's dream baby: healthy and quick, doing things that showed you were "advanced" for your age every milestone you hit. You never met a stranger; however, you never had trouble communicating to someone exactly how you felt about them, good, bad, or indifferent. You were quite the discerned one.
You never really babbled baby talk; you just took upon yourself to start communicating. It was as you looked at us and said, "Let me school these people. They need help." And thereby thrust us into your world.
Your oldest sister was intrigued by you. Everything you did fascinated her! She would study you as you were the object of her affection was strategically dying to conquer. She was (and still is) so attentive to your every move. Everything you did was a big deal, and proud is an understatement when describing Kourtnei as a big sister. She is always concerned and thoughful when it pertains to you and Khari. I often have to remind her that I am "all of y'all's mama."
The middle sister was not as taken with you in the beginning. She was very busy with her own life when you were born. I have a confession: at times, I even felt a little guilty because so much of our time, money, and attention was on her that I never put you in anything. But you didn't seem care. Whenever you would see her, your little face would light up like a smiley faced emoji. To me, Yukhari's a lot like me: extreme. Either we are a fireball of energy, or we are somewhere lying down by ourselves. Whatever state she was in, you were her audience, cheering for her the loudest when she was performing or watching guard as she slept. "Khari's asleep. Do you want me to wake her up?" I would ask why, even when I already knew the answer. That's just how it is with sisters (smiley face.)
Today, you are simply you. Assured, independent, ready. The beautiful mystery of you is, even when I feel like you're unprepared, you show up "ready," which is still baffling to me. That is a skill I still don't have, and I'm your mom!
Your presence is vital. When you are not somewhere, there is a hole. Whenever you are not somewhere, your name always comes up. You matter. The essence of who you already are is influencing the world world around you. You can be a game changer for God's glory, if you continue to respect the God in and of you. Never forget that.
But more than ALL OF THAT, my prayer is that you love God more than anyone else, that you maintain a relationship with Him. You and I have had talks about what could be, and I feel like you get it. I've explained to you that we all are here on purpose for a purpose with a purpose. I love knowing that you have already began to explore your purpose. I love that you understand it's not about me or your dad. I love that about you, even though, selfishly, I have to admit it's a little scary at times. But I trust God and Him only. So I know the plans He has for you are to prosper you and not to harm you. So when tough times come, and they will, I know that you've already overcome by the blood of the lamb, and the words of your testimony will set captives free.
I love you with a love that is impossible to understand. I love you so much that I never want to smother you. I never want to hold you back. I want you to feel free to explore having knowledge of information as well as consequences. I pray that you approach life as a problem solver and not problematic, always searching for solutions, not just answers. I pray that God's peace always abounds in you, around you, and through you. I pray you be whole and entire, that you lack nothing. I just love you, Dhani Ky, and I like the person you are. Always evolve, but never change. Happy birthday tomorrow, Mama.
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